Any parent occasionally confronted with child aggression. Some moms and dads feel even with a light shock: I try not to miss anything, brought up correctly, and the child suddenly manifested itself completely from an unexpected quarter. Aggression — is another way of expressing emotion. It is inherent in all people, but the adults in most cases can restrain themselves, and the child has yet to learn. Children's aggression — it is not necessarily evil, it may be other negative emotions: fear, resentment, helplessness.
Most often, children are showing the first aggression between the ages of two and three years. At this time, the child, new abilities, and he longs for more independence. Not all mothers and fathers understand this, so not ready to give it to the child. However it is one of the most important periods in the development of the child, when he can not learn one new skill. Baby should not interfere with the other hand, should make every effort to help and hedging. Baby anyhow will fight for their rights.
The next period is at the beginning of school age — after 6 years. The child's life changes dramatically when he goes to school. Cause of aggression can become or dissatisfaction with their appearance, lack of understanding of others, ridicule classmates or too high expectations of parents. Often a manifestation of aggression — a kind of way to draw attention to themselves. Psychologists in one voice insists that parental love should be unconditional, that is not dependent on any circumstances. The child should be sure that he is loved, even when he is wrong or does something contrary to their parents.
Of course, being a perfect parent is not easy. Misses are even those who are very seriously and understand the approaches to the issues of education. All parents love their children no matter what, but they rarely talk about it, considering that's obvious. But experience shows that children often begin to doubt the feelings of the parents, and then there are good reasons.
For a small child the family — this is his universe. If there is something strange to him, it can affect his behavior. For example, my mother in the morning in a bad mood, she was not feeling well, and he demands attention and does not understand why she is not able to give him time to the full. The right thing — to explain your feelings baby language he understands. But often the mother when the next request for a walk or even shrugs breaks to cry, and then she reproaches herself for the act. And in some families, such communication — «norm.» Adults should not, under any circumstances, to vent their problems on their own children.
Children — the eyes and ears. They absorb the behavior of others is often even unconsciously, and then do the same. That's just what adults consider normal in the children's play may seem horrible. Parents often do not even notice that scold the child for that easily allow themselves. How can a child, in this case to the end to understand what is his fault?
It happens that provoke aggression in the child features of his character. Active child should be able to throw out their excessive energy. If you constantly straighten it and limit it will protest with aggressive behavior. In the daily routine of a child to include more active pursuits, but be sure to alternate with those that require perseverance.
Aggressive behavior can become habitual, if it helps the child to achieve the desired from the parents. Some moms and dads are prepared for anything, just to calm down and become child to behave well. Of course, get it, baby calm down, but not for long. Stumbling on the ban, he again resorts to favorite method.
Cope with children's aggression can, although it is not so simple. The first step is to analyze what has caused this behavior. Perhaps it arises in certain circumstances: a hike to the doctor, observations in public places, leaving parents or quarrel. Do not respond to aggression with aggression. Families in which the parents are constantly communicating with children, rarely experience this problem.
If mom and dad share their emotions with children, recognize their mistake, the children begin to better understand the response of parents and also share them with their problems, and it's excellent prevention of aggression. If there is someone to talk to, the troubles of life are carried easily.
Parents should explain to children that negative emotions are natural, and nothing terrible here, but you also need to teach the child the right to remove stress, get rid of the negative. If you do it consistently and patiently, then eventually the child will understand that any problem can be solved without hysteria, without stomping feet and broken toys.